bittersweet melody.

so in 3 days i fly back to good 'ole cali. i'm the very definition of bittersweet! seriously, i can't wait to get back and see people and get on with 3rd year (and thus closer to 4th year, i am drooling with envy watching all these 4th yr slackers), but the other part will miss living alone, having free food prepared for me, and the hospital and people i work with. i was talking to my intern today and she commiserated with my disappointment with the transient relationships that we form in medical school and i guess in internship as well. you spend hours, days, weeks with people and bond and form friendships and then you move on and usually break all communication. it's a sad commentary on something. 

before i lay me down to sleep...

i have another observation: while chilling in the good ole' nursing home, i got to enjoy the television viewing of my grandma's roommate (who loves to blare her tv 24/7 - i wanted to move grandma but i guess they have bonded), anyway, my first observation is that she watched far and away twice in the same day, just because they play it twice doesn't mean you have to watch it both times.
more importantly is that in the afternoon she watched dirty dancing which i thought was a good choice. the funny part is that i was going for a bathroom break and as i walked down the hall and listened, i realized that inside over half of the rooms, dirty dancing was blaring...which leads me to believe that dirty dancing is a nursing home favorite.
this all brings me to the ultimate question: what will be the movie blaring throughout the nursing home when we are old. any votes??

back to the rush

it's 11:17 and i'm still in the hospital. i have been on call all day and my team didn't get any calls until 8:00 pm. so we've all been hanging out, studying, napping, playing with courtney's baby. it's been a chill day hanging out in the hospital....that's until 10 minutes.

we were in the ED finishing an admit of a drunk guy when the code pager went off...my intern courtney had the pager and has been hoping for a code for my sake (i've never been to a code and i really need to intubate someone as i didn't get that signed off on anesthesia even though i did it...and i refuse to do anesthesia again to get a stupid signature)...so the code pager went off and 3 of us went running from the ED to the top floor where the code was. we got there and i just saw lots of blood. it wasn't a real code, that's all i can say, but it sure got the adrenaline running, so when my resident told me to go to bed, i knew that wouldn't be happening. so i figured i would blog, then try to get some sleep before i get another admit. the ED was dead all day, but now it's jumping. (ps. i spotted 2 new hot male nurses tonight so i might just go hang out down there!!)

now for more on my trip home. i got to see family and friends which was nice. most of all i got to be with my grandma. she slept a lot so i just sat at her bedside all day friday and studied, then sat and held her hand sabbath as she slept. she recognized me and whispered my name, let me brush her teeth once, and i even got her to laugh. she's slipping away and likely won't be alive a month from now, so those small victories were worth 14 hours of driving (some of which were in white out conditions and slippery roads). please just keep my grandma and my family in your prayers. we know that her time has come and for her sake we want her to pass peacefully, but there's also this selfishness that wants her in our lives still.

Home Sweet Home

so i am back in pennsylvania. i took an unplanned trip home for two days because my grandma had another stroke and isn't doing too well. i saw her tonight and she was worse than i imagined. i will spend the day with her tomorrow, but let's dwell on happier thoughts.

so i got to drive the little corolla home. i was quite impressed that i put $20 in the tank and got all the way home on it (375 miles). this made me ponder the corolla's superiority to danika (my ford taurus), but then i asked myself, 

"self, can the corolla carry 6 passengers legally?" -- not really

"can she carry 5 passengers comfortably?" -- not so much

"can she haul all my earthly possessions across the country in one trip?" -- not even a little bit

so i decided that danika has job security, for those reasons and also because i am in more debt than the US govt (a slight exaggeration) and so a new car is not in my near future. 

danika's superiority was asserted when i got to the house and got stuck in the driveway. now we had lots of snow today and dad hasn't plowed yet, but none of our other cars have had any problems with a couple of inches, and the corolla was stuck. this led me to an adventure because i was wearing flip flops and my sneakers were in the trunk. i got into the house and donned my mom's winter boots (those hot ones with the fluffy fur sticking out the top) before heading out to shovel out my car and then shoveled an area to park (stuck free). 

feeling quite accomplished, i returned to the house where i discovered that my hands were frozen - completely - we are talking Raynauds. they have now thawed and thus i am able to type. 

so now i am home after a long 7 hour drive which included some white out conditions and some yummy sheetz! i got home and noticed that the ceiling is falling down in the den, i asked my dad if we were poor, he says no, but i think it looks pretty white trash! this conversation led to the revelation that my parents are gonna sell their house and build a new one since this one isn't practical for an aging couple! they have never consulted me and my dad is already talking about materials!! i told them not to get any bright ideas because i am storing all my east coast earthly possessions here and have no intention in getting a storage space. i also have already laid out the floor plan for our hidden "anne frank" style attic for when the time of trouble comes - do any of you heathens want to volunteer to live in my house and smuggle food to me and my family when they start persecuting adventists???? applications will be accepted via e-mail! 

digging into the dregs

i am trying to think of a funny observation or commentary on my day...let me ramble, maybe something will come to the head like a white head! :)

this weekend greg and gina came and visited me! it was great, the very first time i have actually gotten hang out with them as a couple since their wedding (i got to hang out with them for a post-wedding day, but this was different) it was lots of fun, we ate yummy indian food and great thai, gina and i discovered a nice running store, got hit by a semi, and went to the air force museum for round 2. (the semi part isn't as exciting as it sounds, their car looks fine and i am not gonna make millions from some personal injury civil suit). so that was my weekend after call.

call was pretty low key. i guess valentines day isn't a day most ppl want to spend in the hospital. the result was eating dinner with my team and getting to know them a little better which is always fun before getting a lecture on headache from my intern (you know you're jealous that you're V-day didn't even compare!) oh and i ate lots of chocolate (it's abundant in the hospital...but don't worry, you won't find a shred of ham in the place!)

oh and i got a rose from mr. b and chocolates from mrs. b which made me smile. i spent time with them and their family. justin (their grandson) has this cool little remote control car that drives on walls, that added to a hamster that we forgot about running around the house in it's ball made for an exciting evening. 

so i rambled through the past couple of days in reverse. sorry i didn't have any deep revelations! :) bed time! 

lost toes and lives

yes, this post is on the heels of the one before it, but i needed to separate subjects, so i am doing a separate post.

yesterday one of my patients lost his toe to amputation. when we were discussing it on rounds that morning, my intern announced that he didn't want to lose his toe...pardon my french but "no $*!t shirlock" - does anyone in my reading audience want to lose a toe?? i guess it could be worse. he wasn't to happy this morning when we talked, but don't worry, he is so concerned about keeping the rest of his appendages that he's NOT going to quit smoking and use the extra money to buy test strips and thus keep his diabetes under better control, because that would be stupid!! (by the way, when i got done lecturing him, he thought i was a real doc and not a student, not like it made a difference)

on a sadder note, i lost a patient. not really in the hospital, but we discharged her earlier this week and she died this morning. this is technically the third patient to die on a service that i'm on...this one i was closest to. it's doesn't seem to be getting any easier! :(

so if you get a chance, say a prayer for the family of this woman you don't know...they are devastated. 

V-day

So tomorrow is the holiday for lovers, that's right, Valentine's Day! I am planning to spend it in the best possible way...in the hospital...on call!!! Yippeee!!! Yes people I am being very very sarcastic! (But I got a card from my Mommy & Daddy today and it made me happy, I love them)

So this morning I was working on my notes at the computer beside my senior resident and he was like, "You should read up on drug overdoses this afternoon".

"Why?"

"Because we are gonna see a lot of them tomorrow."

"Oh, cuz it's a Saturday."

"No, cuz it's Valentine's day."

"Sad."

el nino?

so yesterday morning, kate had to scrape off the windows before we could vicariously maneuver the streets of kettering. this morning kate was post call and so i came in alone. i was planning on having to scrape my window, but found a frost free car upon emerging from my apartment. i appreciated the change in events...my appreciationg was heightened when i got a text from miss kristyn anne mannoia informing me that she had to scrape off her car this morning in loma linda california, which led me to check out the forcast.
current temp in kettering 55, loma linda 52. overnight low in kettering 52, loma 43. now who's laughing?? that's right - i'm going for brisk runs outside and sunbathing! loma linda natives are getting out their long johns!
i love el nino! :)

in other news, i am on call tonight...my first patient had a diabetic foot ulcer - i don't think this is breaking HIPAA, but to be careful i won't say too much. it's my first problem of this type and it's quite intrigueing in a smelly, made me throw up in my mouth a little sort of way. my senior just came into the doctors lounge and so i had to pull up uptodate real quick and pretend i was researching diabetic foot ulcers!

which leads me to my team - they are great. i have an attending (who is 8 years older than me i found out today), a senior (age 30), an intern (age 30-who spent over an hour this morning teaching me to read EKGs), and an ER resident (age 28), plus the 4th year and me. i'm the baby of course! this was the topic of convo over the pizza our attending brought us for dinner, that and strokes, diabetic foot ulcers, and vaginal bleeding. do we know how to have fun or what?

sporty cars and other niceties!!

the first nicety is that i just ate a couple bites of carrot cake from the Atrium Grille at the hospital!! that's four layers of cake that cancel out the hour i spent at the gym today; four layers that are only interrupted by fluffy cream cheese frosting to guarantee that i am double wide when i leave. 

in other matters, i must report that the gentlemen i share a car with not only haven't gotten the "heat the car up for andi" memo, they also have forgotten the "share the car with andi" portion!! 

this initially produced some frustration (and my logging a mile PR on the treadmill), but resulted in me getting to use Kate's car today (which i discovered is a step up). my original car was a white chevy impala, not the new model, maybe a 90's model. nice, but nothing snazzy (i didn't complain when i learned that helen and matt drive a minivan...perfect for helen who is our asian mama). then today, kate handed me the keys and told me where to find her car, which turned out to be a sporty 2008 silver corolla...way super cute. i have been zooming around kettering ever since! one minor problem: i still drive like a californian which contributed to one overzealous old lady honking at me! she needs to learn how to get out the way. 

seriously, this cake is amazing, the kind with the little marzipan carrot on top! yummy! tomorrow i am on call, which i think is a good reason to indulge in a chocolate bomb!!! okay, maybe not...and maybe i will put the carrot cake in the fridge and let Al eat the rest! stopping is just the hardest part...

Snow!!

So this morning I headed to work, I was like 2.5 minutes late (late is a relative term, with third year you decide when to come in, you just have to get your work done before rounds, but i was late according to my planned departure time), but I was still calm, because I figured that I had gotten lost so many times the day before that it was impossible to get lost in the hospital today.

Side note: This was after getting lost 2 times the day before. The second time required that I backtrack to where I left my intern (I think this ability to backtrack reflects my innately superior sense of direction that could only be foiled by Kettering hospital and a section that is only accessible by elevator which is against my natural inclination to take the stairs). So I shamefully had to report that I could not find my locker and thus get the important paperwork contained there, yet he should entrust me with patient lives wholeheartedly (after guiding me back to my locker) 

So anyway, back to 2.5 minutes late. I rushed out of the apartment building to my waiting wheels (a white Chevy Impala) which I had been fortunate to park right in front of the building, which made it all the easier to immediately see that it was covered in snow (with the pre-requisite coating of thick ice underneath). 

At this point, I am stupified...seriously, I haven't dealt with this in years! I mean in Pennsylvania or Michigan I would have pre-heated the car and planned my departure 10 minutes sooner, but those habits are gone!

So my solution was to blast the defrost and start a search for the ice scraper that I hoped would be in the car (a search that should have been conducted before the trunk had frozen itself shut!) So I got the scraper and removed the snow like a pro before assuming THE STANCE. The Stance being that hunched over old lady driving position that has you view directly over the steering wheel in the small clear area that is ice free thanks to hi powered defrost). Thankfully I live like 1.5 miles from the hospital and got there safely.

By the time I got into the hospital I realized two things:

1) my gloves will be coming tomorrow

2) i'm glad that i start sharing the car with shawn tomorrow, he seems like a gentleman, i therefore look forward to a fully heated and snow free vehicle with an included chauffeur to take me to work tomorrow! 

 

Manifesto

So this is a new blog that I am going to try to keep up, not because I find my musings to be noteworthy, but because Irene told me that I should blog when I am on my away rotation in Kettering and it got me to thinking that I will be having a lot more adventures this next year (thus the Southwest Rapid Rewards credit card - cha ching!) and so this would be a great way to pseudo-stay-in-touch! 

So please read and leave comments or just skim and chuckles, whatever! :)